Firstly, it’s hard to believe I spent most of my twenty eight years on this planet in this country without actually going inside this place. Where to start? It’s pretty hard to sum up nearly a millenium of history with a five hour visit. Pro tip: if you go make sure to take the Yeoman (Beefeater tour), it’s great, especially if you get the man I had who just ripped the piss out of the American tourists! Although, to my shame, they knew more about our history than I did.
So, I still haven’t really started yet have I? The highlights are The Chapel of St Peter ad Vincula (circa 1,500 executed traitors were buried there); the Crown Jewels (I thought it was just the crown, it turns out it includes each monarchs crown (it’s one each apparently…) and loads of other things including a gold bowl that holds 1,400 bottles of wine; the tour of the White Tower (which William I ordered the building of) that includes the amouries and the history thereof (Henry VIII’s armour is in there and let’s just say he thought quite a lot of himself regarding a certain area…); the Yeoman’s stories including the Bloody Execution which required five swings of the Headsman’s axe and the neck still wasn’t severed! Also, the inscriptions on the walls by prisoners, some of which were being tortured and most of which are circa five hundred years old is really something.
All that and I haven’t even mentioned the lions, the polar bears, the elephants and the huuuuge cannons. Also, Guy Fawkes was tortured on the rack there to reveal his co-conspirators, although I think I’d prefer that to the Scavenger’s Daughter (if you don’t know, look it up, or don’t if you’d prefer!).
P.S: If you don’t like history, especially the gory horribe parts I suggest you stop reading my blog.
Strawbs – written 10 June 2016, published 11 June 2016 (posted on new blog 14 July 2016).
In case you don’t know what it looks like!
The Scavenger’s Daughter
Worth a shot I suppose…
Nice try Henry VIII!